Archive | October 2011

In favor of Candy Corn!

I was unaware that Candy Corn was such a controversial topic!

Pro-Candy Corn Stance

My day versus Sammy’s day.

The day from my point of view

The day from Sammy’s point of view

Mmmm? What?Oh… God… the alarm… it’s so early…. I don’t want to get up…. but… the alarm It’s time to get up! Yay!So exciting!

We’re getting up!

I have to shuffle my way into the bathroom because my bladder feels the size of a smallish watermelon… Outside! Outside! Outside!It’s a beautiful day! The sun is shining and I have a whole yard to run around in! Also, my choice of trees to pee on!
Why… oh why…. won’t the coffee make itself? Look! A bowl of food magically appeared in front of me! Yay!
Time to check the email…. blah… spam spam spam, shopping, spam, more spam. Wow… after all that getting up and running around and peeing, and eating… I need a nap. I’ll just curl up under the desk here. This is so great.
Holy crap! Is that my bank balance? I’d better run to the bank. A CAR TRIP?!?!!? JOOOOOOYYYYYY!
Drive drive drive Look at the world! It’s so beautiful! Look at all the people, and the grass and trees and the birds… wait… is that a cat? CAT!!!!!
Drive drive drive Guy on a bicycle! Why do you torment me so! I… can’t…. get to you! Ride away guy on bicycle! Ride away!
Ok… I’ll stop at the post office quick. People! Walking on the sidewalk! They… they… ARE TOO CLOSE TO MY CAR! Go away people! Go away now!
I’m… ah… so embarrassed by my dog. Did you see the people! Did you see how they just walked on by after I barked at them! I know they were going to hurt my car… but then I barked and they just kept on going!
I’ll just stop at the bank for a minute here and make a deposit. Sammy, be good. PEOPLE! More people! Oh… that one is too close! And that one! And that one! I have to bounce back and forth to bark at them all! And.. into the back! And the front! And the left side! And the right side! And the back again! So much barking!!!! Wait… is that a cat?!?!?
No, really, he’s harmless, he just… gets excited. Mom’s back! Mom’s back! Yay! We drive more now?
Drive drive drive… Look at everything I can see out this window! So many things to see
Drive drive drive… And look, there’s things to see on the other side!
Drive drive drive Really, I STILL can’t get in your lap while you drive? So not fair.
Oh, hey… I love this song…. Don’t stop… believing! Why…. is mom…. screaming?
Drive drive… Wow! We’re home! We’re home! This is so exciting! We’re HOOOMMMEEEEE!!!!!!
Ok… we’re here Open the door open the door open the DOOOOORRRR! Oh God… OPEN THE DOOR!
Wait… Sammy! Don’t knock me down! WE’RE HOME!
Ok… c’mon. Let’s get in the house. The HOUSE! I’ve missed the house! I need to check this room! And THIS room! And now THIS room!
Sammy? You want to go outside? WHAT? Outside?!?!?! Yes! OUTSIDE! OUTSIDE! OUTSIDE! NOW NOW NOW NOW NOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOW!!!!Yay! I’m outside! What a beautiful day!
Ok… back to the email, and I really need to write a new blog post… Mom! Mom! Mom! LET ME IN! LET ME IN! LET ME IN!
Ok… c’mon in Sammy, and then I need to get back to work. Oh… I think it’s time for a nap under the desk again. Oh, look… FEET! I shall lay on them….